How To Translate Man Code
Ladies, after answering literally 100 thousand communications over the past few years, I’ve learned that some men speak in code.
I’ve taken the liberty of translating these codes, so you can save yourself lots of time and energy:) Ready? Here we go…
- “Hey baby, I’m a wealthy Daddy who is ready to buy ALL your banned content”:
- I’m actually broke, will ask for free samples, and then call you a scam when you don’t send it.
- “I love this naughty list of content, can you describe it all in EXPLICIT detail? This will help me choose”:
- I have no intention of buying anything. I’m jerking off to the thought of you answering, and as soon as I receive your email I’ll blow a load halfway through the first sentence, and then fall asleep.
- “Hi babygirl… I’m a real DOM and am ready to use and abuse your holes. Here is my number, call me now:
- I have just watched 50 Shades of Grey and drank half a bottle of fireball. My mom doesn’t know I’m using her work computer.
- “Oh my god I LOVE your lost of banned content, there is so much to choose from I need to get home and look it over and you will here from me tonight! Promise!”:
- You’ll never hear from me again.
More advice on translating man code below …
… continued (by the way fucking COMMENT below! I finger my own asshole more when I get more comments).
More Of This Shit
- “Are you into rope Shibari play? I would love to tie you up. I own a dungeon and have lots of experience”:
- I do yo-yo tricks in a basement apartment I share with 2 other men, and jerk off to Anime.
- “I’M a SERIOUS Master who is VERY strict, stern, and loving. I am looking for a perfect slave to fulfill my every need. You will need to follow my instructions at all times, and will be my 24/7 fuck toy. What say you?”:
- I’m a virgin.
- “Kristy, I am an incredibly busy man and don’t have time to email you. Numbers work better. You may text me.”:
- I’m unemployed and jerking off in the guest room of my aunts house.
- “Kristy, I feel incredibly connected to you, and feel like you need a man like me. Together we can explore the world. I have an extensive education and am also very emotionally intelligent with woman. Let’s begin this romance. Yours, truly, Garth.”:
- I cum in 15 seconds. We will have a 3 day relationship that I sabotage through my insecurity, and I will then stalk you online for 8 years.
Lol
Kisses
Kk
